So here we are with #2 and bedtime operation. We started with Aid when he was 18 months. I know, I know. I did a lot of things wrong with Aid. In all fairness he vomited whenever I let him cry and no one could tell me what to do with that one. It's much harder to watch your 6 month old cry so hard he vomits and continue on. Lessons learned and he we are with Grant. Who started out as the best sleeper ever. By 6 weeks (?) he was sleeping 5-6 hours and by 3 months he was sleeping through the night. I thought the baby Gods had smiled down on me and rewarded me for making it through with Aid. I was wrong.
About a month ago, Grant stopped sleeping through the night. Just like that. I thought he was going through a growth spurt again and after a few days he would sleep again. I'm still waiting. At first I thought it was teething and started giving him Tylenol and Teething tablets but after doing that for far longer then the recommended time period I stopped. Then I decided perhaps milk was not keeping him full enough. He was really eye balling our food so I went for it. Yep. He was hungry. He ate and ate and ate. But did not sleep. (I should clarify that he is still an excellent napper). I even tried Benedryl, and while it made him terribly groggy, he did not sleep ant longer. Then we had our 4 month (yes we went in at 5 but I do the best I can) appointment and I mentioned it to our Dr. She gave me the straight talk and told me that I needed to put Grant down at his naps slightly awake so he would learn how to sooth himself back to sleep. With a big sigh I knew she was right. I started that afternoon. He was basically fine with this new idea and I was pleased and hopeful that our nights would start to get better. I was wrong again. Grant has only gotten worse. He is now back to waking every 3-4 hours and I feel like I have a newborn again. My back is permanently kinked, I'm tired, I'm one eye balling it half the time, and the minute that Bob gets home I run off to take a nap before I make dinner. And it's been wearing on me.
So last night we started. I have to say started because in all fairness despite all I have learned as a parent I still have a hard time with this one. He's so young. I am filled with doubts. Maybe since he isn't nursing as much he isn't getting enough fat to keep him full (a dear friend brought this up and I can't stop thinking about it), maybe he really is just hungry. He eats well when I have gotten him up. He's not just soothing himself to sleep. He's eating. So how do I keep this kid full enough?
Grant screamed (and I mean SCREAMED. A screechy horrific cry that not even Bob could sleep through. And he did Aid's cry it out because he could sleep through the crying.) He tried walking him, I tried walking him, we just let him scream....for about 2 1/2 hours before I gave in and fed him. Then he smiled up at me and cooed for the next hour....he wins.
It's just a hard process for me. And I really had hoped that I would get to side step it this time around but I suppose you don't just get everything you want.
Wish us luck and please leave a comment if you have any words of wisdom or think it's too early. I am in need of support on this one.
There are many different ways to parent, but for what it is worth, I think you are doing the right thing by letting him cry it out. I stuff Matilda full during the day and she just doesn't get fed if she wakes up during the night. The first night of that she screamed for 2 hours. The next was an hour. The next was 15 minutes. Now every couple of nights she'll wake up and cry but she goes back to sleep in 15 minutes.
ReplyDeleteOkay...but that is my kid. Every kid is different and maybe Grant needs something different. I'd let him scream, no matter how long it lasted, but I'm kind of a hard-ass on the sleep issue. I know what happens to me without it and I don't mess around.
So...I really believe if you stick with the cry it out Grant will figure it out. I also don't think he's too young for cry it out. But like I said - hard-ass.
You will get through this. You're already a year ahead of where you were with Aiden! The Bures family WILL sleep again!
I love you Em. Thank you for saying exactly what I needed to be reminded of. Hopefully tonight will be better....
ReplyDeleteI agree Emilie, the first few nights will be terrible, but Grant will learn that he is still safe and loved, and he will eventually be able to go to sleep on his own. There is nothing more hearbreaking than hearing your baby scream, but if you can make it through thise few days, the rewards will be ten fold. Hang in there Karen, get your rest when you can, you need to care for yourself, so you can care for those adorable babies.
ReplyDeleteI think I mentioned this before, but just in case, when we were first getting JAke to nap by himself, he screamed as well, I would go in every 15 minutes or so, pat him on his tummy give him back his puck, and leave again. THis seemed to really help him.
Hougs and kisses coming your way, you can do it!!!
Now go to sleep Mr. Grant!!!! :)
I am of the same sleeping training philosophy as Emilie. I started at 4 months with both my kids. Oliver cried for 3+ hours. I went and sat outside and called my mom. I think Amelia cried for only 1 hr the first night. It sucked but was well worth it. No baby had ever died or ended up in therapy from crying it out at 5 months.
ReplyDeleteBut with that said, he's your kid. I know it's a tough struggle between your heart and your brain. You are a great mom and whatever you choose will be right for your family. Hang in there and leaving the house always helps.
ship him on out, I'll do it for you
ReplyDeleteWait! He's too young. Six months is okay, but not 5 months. I suffered with Viv, oh how I suffered, but if you can just hold on a little longer, it will be easier at 6 months.
ReplyDelete